AND THEN THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER...

[mercat]

Alright, so, because it's short, I'm gonna go with what they did wrong. And because nervous energy, you know, I like to complain. I get it from my uncle.

1) Very dark. Reminded me too much of why Temple of Doom Failed.
2) CGI... I'm sorry; I'd rather have fake-looking mannequins blue-screened (...Temple of Doom much? Honestly, I didn't plan for that comment consistency, it's just coincidence) than CGI-falling. For some reason, CGI just can't capture GRAVITY. It sucked in Quidditch, and it sucks in Jack's escape.


3)....OMFG, CLIFFHANGER?!*

4)um... NORRINGTON? Seriously, every time he walked on my brain got staticky, subconsciously said "DIE ANOTHER DAY PIERCE BROSNAN CAPTURED OMG JAMES BOND" and I went all "WTF?!" for a second.

5) DUDE. FANGIRLS. I HATE THEM. THEY WERE EVERYWHERE IN THEIR "I THINK I'M A PIRATE BUT REALLY I JUST LOOK LIKE I WENT TO HOT TOPIC" OUTFITS WITH THEIR TRAIN ENGINEER HEADBANDS AND OMG THERE WILL BE SO MUCH BAD RAPEFIC AND SLASHFIC UP IN THE NEXT 10 MINUTES. FUCK, IT'S ALREADY TOO LATE, THERE'S MASSES OF IT NOW. Sorry for the caps, just... fangirls. < Libby > ew! < / Libby > And too much of the movie was, like, WRITTEN ESPECIALLY FOR RAPEFIC, HORROR OF HORRORS, WHAT HAS BRUCKHEIMER BROUGHT TO MY HELL. Seriously, I'm thanking God I gave up on fanfic, but I was appalled by the sheer number of fangirls (and gay guys!!!!! hahah. One guy even thanked us for dressing up because his friends wouldn't. He was gay. LUFF!) in that one room. It was... stifling. The STUPIDITY was stifling. See the double asterisk. (**)

And now, the good stuff:

*1) The only solace I can take to escape from bad #3 is that I CALLED THE FUCKING ENDING STRAIGHT UP.

FUCK

YEAH.

(nevermind the fact by that point I had only drunk half my GAJEERA!size Mello Yello and contained the Seven Seas in my bowels. Actually that helped distract me from my anger. Good thing. God bless Mello Yello/Mountain Dew/Moon Mist/Sun Drop. It's my rum, LOL.)

2) Continuity: VERY, VERY, VERY well done. Exceptional. The movie is fantastic. All the continuity questions I had before the movie were answered. Now I've got just one or two, and those are the result OF this movie, so, fair's fair. (I'm including references back with continuity. References were a little heavy but continuity was good. I think if you see it you'd know what I mean.

**3) Pintel and Ragetti's lines: Genius. they talked so fast with such big words, there were several times I WAS the only one laughing in that room. But they were GOOD.

4) Yay for not using the same bad-guy music! Also, ORGAN! MUSIC! w00t! Slight Phantom reference: w00t!

Oh, fuck it, argh, it's just too good. I'm going to see it at least once more. I give up trying to write all the good stuff, just go see the movie! It was fantastic. Amazing. lol, and awful... omgtearforstress

=^n.n^=

OH, and also almost forgot. My grandma got a pontoon boat, which we're using up on Lake Loramie. Apparently we're the only ones on the lake who think pirate flag is funny, so it's a pirate boat. So far the only good name we've got is "The Blunder Bus," which I came up with after my grandma thinking "Buck Boat" was good (Oh, you didn't get the reference to Buckbeak? ...neither did I.) and because the boat won't idle or go into reverse at the immediate moment. Got anything better? Do tell.

Anyway, we've got two calcium carbide working cannons for it. And seeing as we also have a paddle boat and two canoes (canoes which I've dubbed the Little Ruby and the Straight Shot, no name for the paddle boat though, as it's also new.

So just wondering, since I'm the pirate authority of the family, and going by the fact that in the first pirates movie Barbossa was gonna be a commodore just for having two boats, does that mean I'm Commodore of four boats and the Captain of my main ship? (That is as soon as I get my boating license. If you're born after 1982 you have to take a class in order to captain a boat, but, um.... *points to self* pirate?)

I just realized WHY I felt slightly jilted by this movie. THERE WAS NO TREASURE. THERE BETTER BE A FUCKLOAD OF TREASURE IN THE NEXT MOVIE. I think true Pirates everywhere felt jilted by this. Think about it... didn't you? (Although Jack's jewelry was a plus, and... the opalescent hairthingabopper... it's driving me sane!

Ok, that's it, I promise. =^n.n^= (Well, for this post.)

OK, I lied; pictures. (not under a cut [but no spoilers, no worries!] for those who don't want to see any spoilers hiding under the cut.)





Ok, that's all.